It happens with almost all of us that something undesirable happens and we start finding reasons to blame things on other people , situation or circumstances. It somehow gives us a kind of consolation. We think of so many reasons as why it happened to us and then we stick to couple of them that we find most convincing. We often love to think and talk about our victim story. Lets see how our victim self thinks and talks -
– I cannot find a job because job market is bad.( ==> I will not find a job)
– I am not getting promotion at work because my manager doesn’t like me. (==>I will not get a promotion)
– I am unhappy in my life because my girl friend dumped me and I lost my job.(==> I will stay unhappy)
– I cannot top this year because everybody in my batch is more intelligent than I am. (==> I will not get top position)
– My venture cannot succeed because my team is not good enough and market is bad. (==> My venture will not succeed)
– If you cant think of any reason and you will simply think that your luck is bad. (==> I will wait for my luck to get better)
When you blame things on others , it makes you feel like a victim. You feel weak and powerless. You feel like a victim to your destiny and life. Its fine to think of reasons but if you take the responsibility of everything that happens to you instead of blaming things on other people and circumstances you will feel immense power which will turn you from a victim to a winner. There is a lot of difference between taking the blame on you and taking the responsibility. You never have to blame yourself for what is happening to you.
You don’t have the control on what happens with you but what distinguish a winner from a loser is how you react to what happens with you. You have the complete control on how you react to things. Taking the responsibility makes you action oriented. You know its you who has to do something about it instead of waiting for situation or your luck to change.You will see your mind working toward the solution, towards making you a winner.You will be amazed with the power of your mind when you really want it to work for you.
Lets see when you take the responsibility ,how your winner mind will think in the above situations
– Job market is bad and I have to work harder to get a job.
– My manager doesn’t like me much , I have to put extra efforts to get appreciated by him and others.
– Now that my girl friend is not with me and I have lost my job, I have to find another girl friend and a job
– There is very tough competition in the class, I have to work really hard to be on the top position
– I have to find better people for my team and modify my business plan as per the current market for my venture to succeed.
–Tough times don’t last but tough people do.
Next time when you see yourself thinking or talking about your victim story, end it right away. Irrespective of what situation you are in, take the responsibility of your life, take the charge of your life and be a winner !!